Tuesday, March 16, 2010

We love you the way you are

Since I was pregnant, we loved our son without limit. When we knew about his genetic condition, we supported him because he was part of our family even although he wasn't born. We provided a healthy diet to strength his development during his fetus stage. We stimulated him with a prenatally stimulation with sensory stimulation; even thought, we didn't know Kids with Trisomy 21 (T21) may have sensory processing problems. But we unconditionally supported our unborn baby loving him the way he was. Two years have passed after our son was born and we haven't let the syndrome taking our son over because it is something he has, it is not what he is. We enjoy our son not matter what. He is smart, happy, cute, funny, persevering, hard-headed, healthy; in other words, he is just a perfect child!
Raising our child with T21 is what "normal" is to us (the word "normal" is a tricky word). It is stressful some times, but it is rewarding all of the time. After all, it is what parenting is all about. What it is normal for us may not be normal for others. He is not walking yet, but he enjoys many things as other toddler, such as: brushing his teeth on the step stool, learning to watch his hands, helping to dry his hair after bath time, helping to put the dirty cloth in washer machine, sliding in the slide as any toddler, playing his little trumpet and blowing bubbles, pretending he is a boxer, scrabbling, riding his tricycle, saying (signing) "mine" when we take a toy away from him, saying mama or mom when he needs help and then some. It doesn't stop him to impress us of how toddlers can be young genius. As my husband says: "The sky is the limit". Our son doesn't know limits and we don't limit him, we just believe in his potential. It's the way we are, this is our NORMAL way.
We are not worried about the future because we cannot know the future. But we can influence the future if we give him all the skills he needs in the present. I do believe all kids with or without the syndrome have abilities. How we stimulate our son today will help him tomorrow. Stimulation is A LOT OF LOVE, FIRST CLASS CARE, GOOD NUTRITION, PLAY TIME and a LOVING FAMILY. After all, STIMULATION is the most important for any child. We keep dreaming about our son's future. We will be there to support him in every stage of his life, not matter how long it will take us to get there. The most important is to get there. We have seen people with T21 being successful in our society that let us to see the new generation of people with T21 with more opportunities and inclusion than ever before.

We put in practice what we have learned in the Catholic faith, Not to Judge Others. If we judge our son's abilities because he has T21, we are dining him to growth as a person. Instead judging him, we give him the opportunity to try. He will do everything he wants to, but it may be in his way and own pace like all of us. We will give him the opportunity to drive. I have known about a teenager with T21 who is learning to drive and other young people with T21 who are driving. It took me 2 years to drive, ha, ha ha. It wasn't because I am not smart. In fact, I didn't study during my first school years because the teachers' explanations were enough. I was an honor student during my entire school years. I was the valedictorian when I graduated from the University with the highest GPA among all the Faculties. I graduated from my master with a A+; even although, my English wasn't that good. But, I also do things in my way and own pace.
Dealing with the fact our son has Trisomy 21 is not what gives us a hard time. Dealing with the fact there are sources out there that can help our son even more, but we cannot afford all of them is what make us frustrated and sad sometimes. If we would be rich or win the lottery, it would be the only way we can afford all of them. But we see the big picture, as parents, we are already doing everything we can. We already know all those sources and we cannot get them right away, but it could be possible we can get them later because Tommy is still little.

God has blessed us in all ways with our son and we are witnesses of the marbles God can do. We thank God every day for giving Tommy a good health regardless the syndrome. We believe God have chosen us to parenting his little angel because he knew we would unconditional love our son because any scarified would be enough and any challenge would never be a predicament.

"4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

Keeping the faith in God and the hope in our son are the most powerful therapies for our souls. When we knew about our son genetic condition, I didn't ask God for a miracle. I asked God for Wisdom to find the right tools and the best way to stimulate my son and put in our path people who would believe in our son's potential. I asked for strength and comfort to surpass any challenge may come. We have accepted the mission God has given to us; we don't want to change it because we love our son the way he is.

Happy Birthday, Tommy!
We love you the way you are.

1 comment:

Ria said...

Beautiful post! Happy Blessed Birthday Tommy!!